Motorcycles VS. Women

Stolen from the interenet.  And for the women in my life…you can kick my ass later…’cause remember…it’s always okay to use tiedowns! 😀

• Your motorcycle doesn’t get upset when you forget it’s birthday.

• You don’t have to talk to your motorcycle after you ride it.

• You can choke your motorcycle.

• Your motorcycle doesn’t get mad when you ignore it for a month or so.

• Motorcycles don’t get jealous if you come home with grease under your fingernails.

• Motorcycles don’t snore.

• Your motorcycle won’t wake you up at 3:00 AM and ask you if you love it.

• Your motorcycle won’t leave you for another rider.

• You don’t have to pay child support / alimony to an ex-motorcycle.

• If you say bad things to your Motorcycles, you don’t have to apologize before you can ride it again.

• If your Motorcycle doesn’t look good, you can paint it or get better parts.

• If your Motorcycle goes flat, you can fix it.

• If your Motorcycle is misaligned, you don’t have to discuss politics to correct it.

• If your Motorcycle is too loose, you can tighten it.

• If your Motorcycle is too soft, you can get different shocks.

• If your Motorcycle makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler.

• If your Motorcycle smokes, you can do something about it.

• It’s always OK to use tie downs on your Motorcycle.

• Motorcycles always feel like going for a ride.

• Motorcycles don’t care about how many other Motorcycles you have ridden.

• Motorcycles don’t care about how many other Motorcycles you have.

• Motorcycles don’t care if you are late.

• Motorcycles don’t get pregnant.

• Motorcycles don’t have parents.

• Motorcycles don’t insult you if you are a bad rider.

• Motorcycles don’t mind if you look at other Motorcycles, or if you buy Motorcycle magazines.

• Motorcycles don’t whine unless something is really wrong.

• Motorcycles last longer.

• Motorcycles only need their fluids changed every 2,000 miles.

• Motorcycles’ curves never sag.

• New Motorcycles must be asked for, and if you don’t want to pay for them, you don’t get them.

• When riding, you and your Motorcycle both arrive at the same time.

• You can kick your Motorcycle to wake it up.

• You can ride a Motorcycle as long as you want and it won’t get sore.

• You can ride a Motorcycle any time of the month.

• You can share your Motorcycle with your friends.

• You can’t get diseases from a Motorcycle you don’t know very well.

• You don’t have to be jealous of the guy that works on your Motorcycle.

• You don’t have to convince your Motorcycle that you’re a motorcyclist and that you think that • Motorcycles are equals.

• You don’t have to deal with priests or blood-tests to register your Motorcycle.

• You don’t have to take a shower before riding your Motorcycle.

• You only need to get a new chain or belt for your Motorcycle when the old one is worn.

• Your Motorcycle never wants a night out alone with the other Motorcycles.

• Your parents don’t remain in touch with your old Motorcycle after you dump it.

• Your Motorcycle doesn’t car what you’re wearing when you take it out.

• Wearing two fresh rubbers makes riding a bike MORE enjoyable.

• The rashes you get from motorcycles go away without those painful IM Penicillin shots.

• One gets in no trouble for storing disassembled pieces of the motorcycle in the basement.

• Disassembling the motorcycle is done out of pleasure rather than need.

• Motorcycles always sound pleasant.

• Unlike women FAT motorcycles aren’t cheap dates.

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