Just a dream?

I dreamed last night…

The bureaucrats have won. Paperwork must be filed in advance for all aspects of life.

Gonna eat dinner Thursday? You needed to file form 34578-b in triplicate at least 4 days in advance. Be sure to attach supplementary form ROCE-1 if not eating the federally mandated “healthy” diet listed in pamphlet 666-1.

“Ah, Mr. Meyer, we see that you wrecked your motorcycle without filing the proper paperwork in advance. Please file a form 7562 with your nearest tax office and be sure and include a check for the late filing penalties. You won’t be allowed to proceed with repairs until the proper notifications have been completed. Please see instructions in book ECKER-234”

And so on. The purpose of the entire system was to raise money to perpetuate itself and in that quest, it had regulated every action in life. Sleep. Eat. Everything. Proper forms and fees had to be filed. God help you if you die without advance notice!

This, of course, spawned an entire class of workers…all “gainfully” employed pushing paperwork around. Filing, penalizing, mailing, processing. Producing nothing, helping no one, building nothing, they somehow managed to make it home at night feeling satisfied that they had accomplished something.

I woke up sweating, thankful it was just a dream.

I’m headed to work…right after I stop by the car tax office to get a $65 sticker to put on the license plate of my motorcycle, and after I hit the post office to drop off the state sales tax paperwork (again). Oh, and I need to stop by the inspection place to get the other sticker stuck on my bike too, but first I need to stop by the insurance company to get another copy of the paperwork that shows that I have paperwork that says that I have insurance. Oh, and I guess I need to see my accountant about my federal taxes…she’s saying that since I opened a small business it’s gonna take at least 40 hours work for me to get the paperwork together that she needs to start my return. She’s confident that I’ll get to deduct her costs from my return…as long as I file the correct paperwork.

Ah well. I guess I’ll get to work eventually. Not really a lot of point in going in though…the guy that approves the change paperwork is on vacation so we can’t do anything…

Daniel Meyer
(form 385, advance notification of posting on a federally regulated blog is filed with the office of BS for this posting)

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One Response to Just a dream?

  1. cruhnke says:

    Did you file form NTMRE-9090 before you went to sleep? Otherwise you are not allowed to have the nightmare.

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